My handsome self. Mommy says the picture looks empty because Scout is not there.

Mommy has been having a lot of crying days lately. She said part of it because she misses Scout. Scout went to live on God's Farm in the Sky about twelveteen weeks ago. He was the "fix Mommy's crying" dog. I don't know what to do when Mommy cries. Me and Bailey just know how to bark.

But we are trying to be gooder dogs. Last week we went for a walk together and we even let our tails touch and we didn't kill each other. Yesterday, I snuck outside with Bailey for a minute and then Bailey snuck down the stairs to the front door with me for about two seconds. We didn't kill each other those times either.



Look! Our tails are touching!

 Bailey even tried to help Mommy with her crochet a blankie project. But that didn't help. I don't know why. I think Bailey made it pretty!
 

Bailey was being a big make a blankie helper.

But Mommy says she still misses Scout. I think it has to do with all of the bottles of bubbles she found. I don't like to play bubbles. Bailey sometimes like to play bubbles but she gets too wild. Scout was the super bubble chasing dog. 

Scout was the super everything dog.

 Murphy says Mommy is crying because us animals cost her so much money and she's still paying the bills from when I ate her inhaler and had to go to the hospital and when Bailey got her surgery to get her girl stuff fixed. And Murphy needs about twoteen hundred dollars to get a tooth taken out because it is O.U.C.H.Y.

She is probably crying because of Scout and how much us animals cost, plus the ants that have come to live in our house. They decided the really like it in our house and Mommy says if they don't leave she is going to move to the Arctic Circle, where it is too cold for ants.



Remember this fun time?

 Or maybe she just remembers last year when there were three dogs who liked to share popsicles. It is not as much fun without Scout.

Love
Bandit

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Disney has a new show "Dog With A Blog". I am not the star.



This is not me. This is a TV blogging dog. But he is pretty handsome, too.



Guess what? Disney is making a new show about a dog just like me. It is called "Dog With A Blog."

I am not the star. The star looks a little like me. He is handsome, too. But I have been blogging for about eleventeen years, so I'm more specialer.

I don't know if the TV dog can write as good as me. We don't get Disney Channel so we won't watch the show. But Mommy says, "Who needs a blogging dog on TV when you live with a blogging dog every day?"

That's right, Mommy. I'm the original blogging Border collie.

I'm pretty sure this TV dog is also not a Mystery Barf champ. But maybe I will write to him like I write to Bo Obama and we can be paw pals.

Love
BANDIT!!!!

Visit Mommy's new Heavenly Creatures blog about animals and faith at Patheos.com. And don't forget to follow me on Twitter!

Me and Mommy visit Highland Park before the Lilac Festival starts

 

The workers are getting the park ready for the Lilac Festival party.
About eleventymillionteen people will come from around the world to smell the flowers.


So today me and Mommy went for a walk in a place called Highland Park. It is a famous place because every year they have a big party called the Lilac Festival. If you live where I live, the Lilac Festival is A Very Big Deal.

Just in case you didn't know, a lilac is a pretty flower that grows on a tree. Butterflies like it and bees like it and mommies like it, too. Dogs don't really care about lilacs. But the trees are good to pee on!



There are a lot of good sniffs to sniff at Highland Park.


So me and Mommy walked for a while in the park. The party doesn't start until next week so we thought we would visit before eleventymillionteen people showed up.

We went up, up, up the hill and passed some people sitting on benches reading books and daddies and mommies pushing babies in strollers and people walking around sniffing flowers. I was the only one peeing on trees.

This is the Reservoir. You are not allowed to swim in there.
Even if you really need to cool off..

At the top of the park there is a place called the Reservoir. This is not a giant swimming pool, even though it looks like a fun place to go for a swim. Especially if you are hot and tired of walking up hills and peeing on trees and being a good dog and not jumping on people or sniffing babies.

The Reservoir is the place where our drinking water comes from! But guess what? You are not allowed to drink the water in there, either. You have to drive home and turn on the kitchen faucet. But they do have a fountain in case you can't wait till you get home.

I could not wait.



Tasty water from the Reservoir. I would rather have had a swim.


Then me and Mommy walked down, down, down the hill and back to the car. It was a good walk and I was a good boy but I was hot and tired. You know Mommy made me take a stupid picture anyway.



This is me. Those are lilacs. Can we go now, Mommy?


The good thing about Mommy is that when I am a good dog, I get a treat. So we went to Tim Horton's for coffee and a Tim Bit. Then we went home and I got sprayed off with the hose.

If you want to learn more about the Lilac Festival, you can visit their website. Or you can visit the festival!

But if you are a dog, you probably want to stay home. It will be hot and there will be a lot of people and loud music and cars, and stuff you will want to eat but you can't, and people who will want to pet you when you don't want to be petted, and you might get bored or cranky and do something bad, like bite someone or pee on someone or steal a hot dog from a child in a stroller. It will not be a fun dog party.

In fact, the smart people at the Lilac Festival said on their website that you are not supposed to bring your dog: "Be kind to your pets and leave them home! We appologize ahead of time for this inconvenience but we are considering the saftey of your pets and other visitors to the Lilac Festival." (I did not make those spelling boo boos. Just so you know.)

You can visit before or after the festival, though! The lilac flowers might not be flowering but you can still pee on the trees.

Your pal,
BANDIT!!

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President Obama eats a dog; Bandit warns Bo

Dear Bo, This is your pal, Bandit! How have you been? It's blechy here today. There are giant plops of slush falling from the sky. I like it better when it is sunny.

Bo, I saw something in the news last week that I think you should know about: Your daddy the President eats dogs. He wrote about it in his book.

He says it happened a long time ago, when he was a kid. But I see in the news that your mommy the First Lady has been working on a big vegetable garden at the White House.

Bo, I am afraid that they are getting ready to serve Roasted Loin of Water Dog with sides of fresh vegetables.

I think you should learn a lesson from Seamus Romney and run, Bo, run! Get away as fast as you can! I hear Canada is nice this time of year.

When Mr. Romney gets into the White House, you can go back. He might make you fly on top of Air Force One when they go on vacation, but at least you'll be with the family and not on the menu.

Bark to you later!
Your pal,
BANDIT!!!!

 Visit Mommy's new Heavenly Creatures blog about animals and faith at Patheos.com. And don't forget to follow me on Twitter!

Back to the cemetery

Me and Mommy went back to the cemetery today. I peed on trees, Mommy took pictures. It was cold. We had fun. When Mommy got home, she blah blah blahed on her blog.

I'm going to take a nap.

Love,
BANDIT!!!

Visit Mommy's new Heavenly Creatures blog about animals and faith at Patheos.com. And don't forget to follow me on Twitter!

My surprise adventure weekend (and I am a very, very bad dog)

"Are we there yet?"

I had a big adventure this weekend with Mommy and my Aunt Jackie. It was a surprise. We went to Pennsylvania to visit Grandpa for dinner because he is having a fiftyleventeen birthday next week.

Just in case you didn't know, Aunt Jackie is allergic to everything in the whole world. Even herself. But she has new allergy medicine and she feels grrrreat! So she said I could sleep in the hotel room with her.  But first I had to get a bath. Boo.

I love Aunt Jackie so I got a bath before our adventure.

Me and Mommy drove our dogmobile from Rochester and Aunt Jackie drove her not-dogmobile from her house and we met at a hotel called the Days Inn.

You should know that driving is boring. It is a lot of stuff passing you out the window and rain making noise on your roof and Mommy singing stupid songs. But you get snacks!



I am not smiling because it is boring to drive all that way.


So this is what we did when we got to Pennsylvania. First, Mommy and Aunt Jackie brought in their stuff. Then they got ready to go meet Grandpa and Carol for dinner. I was supposed to stay in the room, but when Mommy left I started barking and barking before she even closed the door. So Mommy said, "I can't leave him here." So she took me with her!

They went to a Barbie Q place and I waited in the car like a good boy. I didn't bark or anything. I just sat in the car and looked out the window and said to Mommy in my mind, Hurry up, Mommy. Hurry up, Mommy.

Then we went to Grandpa and Carol's house for a little while. You should know that when you go to visit your dad and take him out to dinner it makes him very, very happy. So happy that if you also bring your dog and your dog chases his cats, he won't even care!



This is Grandpa. This is also Carol's foot.


Then we went back to the hotel. Staying in a hotel is fun. You can jump on the beds (only if you have sheets over the bedspreads to keep off paw prints) and have breakfast in bed and stay up late and watch TV. It's a great, snuggly time.

When you stay in a hotel, you get breakfast in bed!



It's fun to snuggle in bed and watch cable TV.


Anyway, I did not poop at all on Saturday, so me and Mommy did a lot of walking around the hotel and the neighborhood behind the hotel. I didn't find anyplace good to poop even though we tried a lot of places. But in the morning I really had to go, so I pooped in the hotel garden. When you really have to potty you can't be picky.

You should know that Mommy picked up the poop because that is what good mommies do. You are not allowed to poop and leave it in the garden.

When Mommy and Aunt Jackie went to breakfast with Grandpa, they left me in the hotel room because they were just at the restaurant next door. Mommy gave me a Kong with peanut butter and I got up on the bed and laid down like a good boy. She closed the door and listened for me to bark (I didn't) and then went to have eggs and bacon.

Except I was only a good dog for about twelve seconds. Then I was a bad, bad dog. I barked and barked and tried to open the door and I found a leash and chewed it up and when I was done with that I chewed up the door.

That is not an April Fools.



Yup. I was a bad dog. I'm sorry!!


Even though I didn't get arrested, I guess it is a big deal when you are a dog and you chew up a hotel door. So Mommy told the front desk lady and the front desk lady called her boss and they told Mommy they would call her today to tell her how many eleventeen hundred dollars it would cost to fix my badness.

I think Mommy wasn't having a good time any more. She was worried it would cost so much to fix that she would have to sell the cat to pay for it.

Aunt Jackie told Mommy that at least she had something to write about now, and Mommy said, "Oh well, there's nothing I can do now except pay for it." But I heard Mommy and Aunt Jackie talking about going to Reptileland to see the alligators and snakes, and I was worried Mommy was going to leave me there because I had been so bad.

But they decided to see the creepy crawlers the next time we had an adventure. Yay, I was not going to be lunch for an alligator! So we drove home.

It rained and snowed and I was not happy in the car and going home was not much more fun that driving there.




This is what it looked like out my window the whole way there and the whole way home. Boring.


But guess what happened today? When the nice front desk lady called she said it would cost zero dollars to fix my badness. Zero means no dollars! She said that there are a lot of dogs who do way badder stuff than what I did and they just leave and don't even tell anyone. She said the hotel fixer guy could take care of my badness pretty easy. That made Mommy cry.

So we had a fun dinner with Grandpa and Carol and got to watch TV and eat snacks in a hotel and be bad and not get arrested for it!

That is my surprise weekend. I think we should have another adventure weekend, except I should not stay alone in the hotel by myself again.

Love
BANDIT!!!!!!!!!

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Spring pictures are boring

Are we done, Mommy? Can we just go to Tim Hortons, please? Now?

If you visited my Facebook page you saw that Mommy made us take stupid pictures in the daffodils at the cemetery.

I hate getting pictures taken. I just like to go run around and then go to Tim Hortons for a Tim Bit. But Bailey rolled around in some stinky animal potty, so that was pretty funny!!

Hahaha! Bailey flopped around in something stinky!!

I did have one good adventure this week. Daddy let me ride in his truck when he took me and Mommy to pick up the dogmobile at Jim the car fixer's.

You ride up really high off the ground and the wind blows your fur all over. It was fun.

Love
BANDIT!!!

Visit Mommy's new Heavenly Creatures blog about animals and faith at Patheos.com. And don't forget to follow me on Twitter!