Sunday, January 31, 2010

Shuffling off to Buffalo

So guess what? I got to go on a big adventure today!

Me and Mommy and Daddy moved Cassie's stuff to her new apartment today. And Mommy thought I should stay home in my crate but Daddy thought I should come. Mommy said, OK, but it's going to be an adventure. Daddy said, Well, we don't have time for an adventure. And Mommy said, Well, if you bring Bandit, that's what you're getting.

First, I helped Daddy load stuff into the trailer last night. Then today I sat in the truck while they loaded up the rest of the stuff. Even if they didn't want to bring me, I wasn't getting out of the truck. hahahaha!

Then we went to Grandmas to get more stuff. Me and Dali were chained outside and we played a little bit. But then Dali got her chain wrapped around my legs and I was tied up like a stuffed turkey until Mommy heard me crying. So Mommy let me loose and I just ran around Grandma's house until it was time to go.

Then I helped Daddy drive his truck to Buffalo. I'm a good navigator!

When we got to Buffalo, Mommy and Daddy chained me on Cassie's porch while they unloaded stuff. There is a lot of room for a dog to lie around on Cassie's porch. Unless your Daddy is trying to move a bed and he gets your chain stuck and then squishes your head against a pole and then yells at you for making him trip. So as long as you're not moving beds, there is a lot of room for a dog.

While I was outside, I met Cassie's neighbor, Joe, and I talked to a dog that went by. Dali will have a lot of new dog neighbors!

Mommy and Daddy talked to Travis, the man who is in charge of Cassie's apartment, and I jumped on him while he and Mommy and Daddy talked about stuff that still needs to be done. Like the rug in Cassie's bedroom still had to be cleaned and they couldn't put her bed stuff in that room. So I hung out in Cassie's new bedroom and chewed on my Kong toys while Mommy and Daddy put together furniture and stuff.

Then we all piled into the truck and went home. On the way, Mommy stopped to go potty in the potty building and when she came out she had french fries and chicken strips! They had a restaurant in the potty building! So we had a snack on the way home.

It was a tiring day. After my snack, I took a long nap.

I think Cassie and Dali are going to be very happy in their new apartment. I hope Grandma doesn't get too lonely without Dali. Me and Scout already decided we are going to go over and shed on her furniture sometimes so she doesn't get lonely.

And that's how I had a big adventure today that I didn't expect to have!

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Mama's boy Bandit

Daddy said last night that I am a Mama's boy. I'm not sure what that means, but he said it like it's a bad thing.

Here is what happened.

Mommy went upstairs to go to bed and I went with her and got in bed with her. Just like I do every night.

Before he came to bed, Daddy took Scout out to potty and then he called me to go potty. Just like he does every night.

Except that I was already in bed with Mommy and I don't go anywhere without her. So I didn't even move when Daddy called me. Remember, I am Bandit the Statue Dog as soon as I get on Mommy's bed. I don't even make room for Daddy. He has to fit around me.

The only way that Daddy can get me to leave Mommy is if he calls, Biscuit! Then I'll go come running. And when I have gone potty and gotten my biscuit, I run right back up to Mommy and claim her before anyone else can.

That's when he called me a Mama's boy.

What's so wrong with that?

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Friday, January 29, 2010

Jerky Daddy

Me and Scout and Mommy tasted some deer jerky that Daddy made this week, and it was the best best best jerky he has ever made in his whole entire life. Thanks for making such good jerky, Daddy! We ate a bunch of it!

Our Daddy is the best. He makes the best hamburgers and the best deer jerky and the best chicken coops.

Then there's Mommy.

Sharing jerky was a good thing that Mommy did for us today.

The bad thing she did for us today was that she went to Buffalo with Cassie and left us alone for eleventeen thousand hours. Scout got to sleep in the recliner but I had to stay in my stupid crate.

Mean Mommy. Stupid crate.

Wait till she finds out that I ate a big giant hole in her blanket when she wasn't watching me.

Love Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Stinky snow day

Mommy was supposed to go to Buffalo today to bring some stuff for Cassie's new apartment. Which meant I would have to be in my crate for the day because Mommy says she is flat broke and can't send me to camp until she gets paid.

But yeah! She had her days mixed up so she gets to stay home with us!

Which is good because it is very snowy out today. Except Mommy is being mean and not going out to play with us. I have tried to tell her that we snow puppies need to be out chasing snowballs, but she is ignoring us.

Rats. And now I have to be in my crate anyway because I have eaten the gas and electric bill and Daddy's hunting catalog.

I am barking in my crate to let Mommy know that I am ready to get out. Except for some reason, Mommy won't let me out until I stop barking. So how am I supposed to tell her that I am ready to be let out if I can't bark? If I don't bark, she might forget about me and leave me here all day!

Come on, Mommy! Let me out of jail! I need to chase snowballs!

Love Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

No naptime for Mommy

Hi, everyone!

Mommy wanted to take a nap today so she put me in my crate so I wouldn't get into trouble while she was sleeping. That Mommy is getting tricky, isn't she?

Then she turned off all the lights, and Scout got up in the recliner and Murphy got up in his cat tree and Mommy got up on the couch and everyone settled in to take a nap.

Except I didn't want to take a nap. I let everyone be quiet for a few minutes and then I said, Hey everyone! Get up! Get me outta here! Please!

Scout decided to move to Mommy's office and sleep under her desk. But Murphy decided to get up and go walk on Mommy's head. Then Mommy decided that with my whining and Murphy walking on her that we were not going to give her a moment's peace. So she got up.

Then I went to take a nap. I had a good rest!

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Monday, January 25, 2010

Vote for me in the Dog Blog Contest

Hey, everyone! Mommy entered my blog into a contest to find the best dog blog. I don't know if anyone else actually has a dog writing their blog - especially a Bandit the Super Electro Dog - but if we win we gets lots of good stuff that I don't even understand. But we would be big winners and I would be famous!

So vote for meeee!!!

Mommy, can you fill in the information for me so people can vote?

Sure Bandit! To vote for Bandit and his It's A Dog's Life blog, go to and enter this code in the voting box: n452W. Remember, you can only vote once.

Thanks, Mommy!

I need to get 50 votes by February 20 to move to the next round. And then I can keep moving on depending on how many votes I get and how awesome I am at writing on my blog.

So tell your friends and vote - or I'll have to come over and eat your sweater and chew your slippers and rip up your newspaper. Hahahaha! Just kidding! Maybe.

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Bandit and Dali run away

Hi everyone!

So me and Mommy went to Grandma's today to hang out for a little bit because Aunt Jackie the Mind Reader was in town. Plus, Dali is going to be moving away in a couple of weeks and I will never ever see her again for a very long time. Unless Mommy will take me to Buffalo to visit her.

Anyway, me and Dali were bad dogs. I did my normal stuff; I ate all of Dali's food and then put my whole head in the bag of dog food and then jumped up on all of the counters and licked some salsa from a dish.

Then, Dali peed on Grandma's floor. She does that sometimes.

Then, when Mommy went to take us out to go potty, we tricked her and ran away! Hahaha! We ran fast. I only got to Leo's house and then I slipped on his driveway and ran back to Mommy so she could kiss my boo boo. But Dali ran and ran and disappeared, and Mommy had to get the car and go look for her. Run, Dali! Run! But Grandma found Dali at Mrs. Pray's house. She was playing in the creek mud. Dali was, not Mrs. Pray.

Then, I was showing Dali my teeth all day, because I wanted her to know that even though I am only 37 pounds and she is 80 pounds, I like to be the chief dog. Dali always smiles at me and wags her tail when I do that, but she is a trickster! Because when I showed her my teeth the last time, she jumped on me and bit me on my face and we had a very good fight. Then Mommy had to kiss more boo boos. I am not going to show Dali my teeth again. She can be the chief dog. That's OK with me.

But we weren't all bad. Mommy played games with us and gave us Cheetos for sitting, laying down, staying and leaving it. We played Puppy School very good. Mommy even made me and Dali do spins like we were in a circus! We got dizzy. I like Cheetos.

On the way home, Mommy stopped at Wegmans to get something for dinner. I waited in the car. When she was putting her bags in, I snuck out of the car. I was going to investigate the parking lot but when I ran around Mommy's car, I realized that there are a lot of cars in the parking lot! Mommy! Come quick and find me!

So me and Mommy just came home and Scout wanted to hear all about my adventure because Mommy wouldn't let him come with us. He is too nervous at Dali's house.

Then Grandma just emailed me and said Dali ran away again! Run, Dali, run! But she is home.

Oh, and I think Cheetos give me diarrhea. Maybe I should not eat Cheetos any more?

Tomorrow, Mommy and Grandma and Aunt Jackie and everyone else is doing January Christmas with a turkey and presents. Mommy said I cannot come because I am a pain in the you know where. Rats. Maybe if I kiss her enough she will change her mind. I should have asked Grandma if I could come. She always says yes to me.

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Bandit the Statue Dog takes a fall

Guess what? I fell out of bed last night.

I don't know what happened. One minute I was sound asleep on Mommy and Daddy's bed. The next minute, PLONK! I was on the floor. I woke right up, and I was very confused.

When Mommy stopped laughing so hard, she scooped me up off the floor like a little baby and tucked me under the covers with her and she rubbed my back until I went back to sleep.

I love Mommy. I hate the slippy blankets on her bed.

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Why Mommy should not leave me in my stupid dog crate

Stupid Mommy and stupid Daddy went to a stupid party yesterday and I had to stay in my stupid crate while stupid Scout slept on the stupid couch for FIVE STUPID HOURS.

That was NOT fair. (Although I was so happy when she got home that I think I hurt both our heads because I was jumping around so much.)

I forgave her but I don't want her to leave me like that again, so today, I am making life miserable for Mommy. She has a big story to write and so me and Scout just keep going outside and coming in every 5 minutes and barking all the time and generally bothering her just when she starts to get something done.

She took us for a walk this morning - or what I call the Sniff, Pull and Synchronized Pee.

Here's how it works: First, we start walking really fast and then stop all of the sudden to sniff something. Then we take off again and if Mommy isn't careful she gets pulled along. Me and Scout are pretending we're sled dogs. Then, when we stop to pee on a tree, me and Scout try to pee on the exact same spot - at the exact same time! One of us usually gets wet and it makes Mommy frustrated.

Hahaha, Mommy! Then Scout pooped and she had to carry it home in one of those dog poop take out bags. Hahaha again!

Anyway, when we got home, I kept taking papers off her desk and running around the house with them. So far today I have also chewed a hole in my new dog bed - a nice, big hole - and I was wrestling with the cat so much that Murphy and I got our heads stuck together because we were biting each other so hard. Mommy had to pry us apart. (Murphy is a good fighter.)

And ding! ding! ding! Now it's 2:30! Nap time.

I know this makes Mommy mad because she got up at 7:45 - in the morning! - and has not been able to get any work done all day. And right now, she also has a headache and is very tired.

Normally, we all take a nap around this time when it's a yucky rainy day like today is. But Mommy can't because she has so much work to do.

That'll teach her to leave me in a stupid crate all day.

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Scout wins a round of mystery barf!

Hey guess what? Scout won a round of Mystery Barf last night! He threw up on Daddy while he was sleeping.

Yeah for Scout!

Love, Bandit

What is Mystery Barf? Bandit explains in this post.

Follow us on Twitter!

Monday, January 11, 2010

Bandit's at Camp Bow Wow!

Hey everyone! Guess where I am?

Camp Bow Wow! Can you find me in the pictures?

Mommy wanted to go meet her friends Phil and Steve to do some writing and she didn't want to lock me in my crate so she sent me to play with my friends at Camp Bow Wow for a few hours. Thank you, Mommy. I get tired of barking.

Scout hates it here because he hates it when there are so many other dogs so he stayed home. I'll bet he's chewing all the toys I don't usually let him play with. Well, I'll be home soon, Scout, so play now while you can! HAHAHA!

Anyway, look at me! I met a lot of new dog friends here. Last time I came I was trying to protect Scout because he was so scared. This time, I get to just play play play!

I'm having fun but I might need to teach them how to play snowball smash.

Love Bandit

PS: I'm home from Camp Bow Wow. My friend Lindsey told Mommy I did pretty good. She said I was nervous, which I was. And then she ratted me out and told Mommy I had to have a little time out because I snapped at someone. She said I wasn't bad, just not sure why that stupid dog was trying to sniff me. So she let me take a little rest in a crate for a few minutes.

Camp was a lot of fun. I followed the girl workers around and watched everyone and then I even played. But HAHAHA, Lindsey! I was not completely tired when I got home! I took a little nap in the car but I was my normal happy self when I got home. I can't wait to come back and play. (If you try Camp Bow Wow, tell them I sent you and I'll get a free day to go back and play!)

Follow us on Twitter!

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Scout and Bandit were bad

Hi everyone. Me and Scout have been bad this weekend.

On Friday night, we tore down the fence in the back yard. Not the whole fence, just the plastic part Daddy put up to keep me from jumping over to visit the neighbors.

Actually, I didn't tear down as much as Scout did. He's crazy with the fence. When we see our friends Kona and Killian through the fences, we get excited and start pulling the tree branches and stuff. Well before we knew it, we had torn down all of the fence and threw the pieces all over the backyard.

Mommy and Daddy were not happy with us at all. Daddy said he was done done done with us but Mommy said we had to fix the fence, because if the fence didn't get fixed, us puppies wouldn't be able to go outside without Mommy because I like to go visiting. And even when Mommy is with me, sometimes I forget and just jump right over the fence and visit Marcus and Tina.

But when the fence is up, I stay right in my own yard where I'm supposed to be.

Yup, they had to fix the fence quick.

So on Saturday while Daddy was at work, Mommy went and got some wire fence and decided to fix the fence before Daddy got home from work. She felt bad that Daddy would have to go out in the cold after working for a whole day making hamburgers to get money so me and Scout can have lots of treats and toys.

So we all went out to work. Then me and Scout were bad again. Mostly me this time.

See, it was really, really cold out on Saturday. And Mommy was having trouble holding that big giant roll of wire fence and hooking it up. It took her a while but she got most of it set up. Me and Scout didn't help because we were wrestling and I was eating poop. Then Kona and Killlian came out and we were barking and barking and pulling on the fence and barking some more.

And then all the fence Mommy was working with unrolled and the whole thing smacked her right in the face and bent her glasses.

When she stopped working to fix them, I stole her gloves. When she went to grab me, she dropped the wrench right into the snowbank and had to reach in with her bare hands. Then she went to grab the wire again and her cold, wet hands stuck right to the wire.

Meanwhile, I was running around the yard with her gloves and chewing them up and Scout was barking and running around her feet to try and get her to throw snowballs.

We were not making it easy for Mommy to fix the fence.

It took about eleventy hundred and three minutes, but she finally got enough fence up to block the hole we made, and we went inside. Me and Scout decided to be good for the rest of the day and we just napped and snuggled with Mommy and let her watch movies.

We haven't found a way to tear this new part of the fence down yet. But we're working on it.

Follow us on Twitter!

Friday, January 8, 2010

Mommy! We want OUT!

Me and Scout have been outside today about eleventeen hundred times. We go outside, eat some snow, come in, have to potty, go out, run around in the snow, come in, eat a biscuit, go out, wrestle in the snow, come in, chew some slippers (OK, that's just me), go out, chase snowballs, come in and bug Mommy to go back out.

We want to go outside and play in the snow, Mommy!! All day! Throw snowballs for us!!

Plus, whenever we come in the house Mommy gives us a new biscuit that tastes really good, so if we want another one we just go outside and then come in and we get a biscuit!

Mommy just does not understand that snow puppies must be outside in the snow a lot. Otherwise we turn into cats and sleep on the windowsills all day.

Love, Bandit

Follow us on Twitter!

Daddy and I play Mystery Barf

Hi, everone. Me and Daddy both barfed in the driveway yesterday.

I barfed because I ate too many snowballs. Daddy barfed because his new medicine made him feel sick all of the sudden and he couldn't get to the house.

No Mystery Barf points in this round of the game. Me and Daddy were both just feeling sick.

Love, Bandit

PS: I ate the button off Mommy's other new sweater today, but she caught me before I could swallow it. But I did poop out part of a sock I ate the other day! So I guess I do win the game!

Follow us on Twitter!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Scout's first reading session of the New Year

Hi, everyone! Scout here! Bandit has been such a blog hog that I haven't been able to write. But today he's been bad so Mommy that said No blogging for you, Bandit.

He chewed her slippers and keeps stealing stuff and now he's barking and barking at me because he wants to write. Mommy is going to put him in his crate if he doesn't SHUT UP BANDIT!

OK, so you know on Wednesdays I go to school to read with Timmy. I am having trouble learning how to lie down for half an hour. I'd rather roll around on the floor with Timmy and play ball or something. But I'm trying!

Well, today is Wednesday. It was really, really cold out and Mommy had to park way almost at the end of the school world. It's a long, long walk from that parking lot. So instead of going right to the elementary school, we went into the high school doors so we could walk inside for half the way.

We had to sign in at the high school first. Well, the ladies in the high school office loved me! They pet me and let me kiss them and they said I made their day.

That made me happy.

But then the bad news was that when we got to the elementary school and signed in and went to Timmy's classroom we found out Timmy wasn't in school today. Which was OK because Mommy had stopped to talk to some lady and there were a bunch of kids today all around me and by the time we got to Timmy's classroom I was ready to go.

So we turned around and said goodbye to the elementary office ladies (who I love!) and went back through the halls to the high school and said goodbye to those office ladies (I'll come back next week, I promise!).

Then we started to walk to our car and you know what Mommy did? She went right onto the baseball field, in all the snow, and started throwing snowballs for me to catch! She let me run around for a while, which was fun. I love playing in the snow.

And then we went to Tim Horton's for coffee and donuts like we do every Wednesday.

And Bandit didn't get any Tim Bits. HA! Wednesdays are Mommy and Scout date days. No Bandits allowed.

So today was bad because we didn't see Timmy but good because I made new friends. And I had a donut hole and Bandit didn't. Sometimes everyone needs a day to be special all on their own.

Love Scout

Follow us on Twitter!