In case you didn't know, Mommy is writing for a blog called Patheos. She writes about animals and God and life and other stuff. Mostly she writes stories about bears having bear cubs and funny videos and stuff about fish and dolphins and other stuff.
Sometimes she writes about dog training, which isn't often because she is not a dog trainer. Sometimes when she writes that stuff people write back to argue with her. Mommy said this week that bad dogs have more fun, and someone wrote back to stay they disagreed with her.
HAHAHAHA!! If you disagree with that, you are obviously not a dog!
We are pretty good dogs over here but sometimes we do bad stuff. It is great. We unfluff pillows and bark like maniacs and help ourselves to snacks from the fridge. If you are a person, it is probably not fun. But if you are a dog? It is the best!
We have a friend on our street. He is a fluffy dog who gets a lot of baths and never gets to run around the yard like a wild animal and chase squirrels and balls. In fact, he is always on a leash that doesn't let him get to the grass. He is a good dog. He is an obedient dog. He is a no-fun-at-all dog.
You should know that even if I am being bad, like if I sneak out of the gate before Mommy can tell me "wait", I will always come back right away. Do you know why? Because I know that Mommy loves me and I love her and I know that even if she is mad she will not whack me with the newspaper or yank my collar. Plus, if we're both going out of the gate we are going on an adventure. So I better come back to Mommy or I will miss out!
I have friends who sneak out of their gates and will not come home unless the dog police bring the home, because they know if they are bad, they are going to get IT. No one wants to come home if they know they are going to get IT for having some dog fun. Not even people want to do that.
I guess it's a good thing I have a mommy who is a humor writer because she says we give her lots of material and keep her life interesting. And everyone knows that an interesting life with naughty dogs is a lot better than a boring life with perfect dogbots! Even if dogbots don't make your sheets muddy!
You are a lucky dog if you get to sleep in your mommy's bed and lick her dinner plate once in a while and dig some holes in the yard and have a good barkfest with your pals sometimes. But you should also know that you have to be a good dog and not bite people and listen when your mommy is telling you to do something. There is a time to be a good boy and a time to be a bad boy.
I have to go now and finish rearranging Mommy's shoes. If I do it right, when she puts on her shoes witout turning on the lights, she can wear two different sneakers all day! I'm a super trickster.
Visit Mommy's new Heavenly Creatures blog about animals and faith at Patheos.com. And don't forget to follow me on Twitter!