Dear Bo Obama,
Hi, paw pal! Mommy read an article today that said you have been in your new home at the White House for a whole year, and that no one threw you a party or anything.
Boo on them, Bo. You need a party.
It's a super big celebration day when a puppy comes to live with his new family and you need a party every year! But maybe the Obamas just don't appreciate you like they should. The article said that you had to live with another family before you went to live in the White House. Is that true?
How come, Bo? Was that so you could learn not to poop in the Oval Office or chew up the carpet in Lincoln's bedroom? Did someone teach you how to sit and stay and spin in circles before the President would let you come home?
That's too bad. They shouldn't worry about you knowing how to do all that stuff. It takes a long time to learn how to be a good dog. Trust me, I know. Your family won't appreciate what a good dog you are unless they also knew what a bad dog you were. And part of the fun of having a family is getting to learn how to be a good puppy while you wreck their house being bad!
I saw that picture of you and your family. They seem pretty nice, I guess.
But Mommy read in the article that you don't even have your own page on the White House website. What's that about? That stupid cat Socks had a page, and Barney the dog had a webcam.
You should have your own blog! We want to hear all about life in the White House! Even though you had to get puppy schooled before they let you move in, do you eat Mrs. Obama's shoes? Has the President stepped in your poop yet? Do they feed you from the table? Do the girls let you sleep in their bed, even after you run through the sprinkler and dig in the flower beds? If they do, then they are a good family. Dirt is a good bonding thing.
Your daddy the President should give you an official job so you can have your own page on the White House website. Me and my brother Scout are spokesdogs for Faceless International. We are going to help teach people about human trafficking and how to be nicer to each other and help each other out more. Talk to your daddy about finding a good job for you. Or maybe he would let you come to a Paw Pawty.
Anyway, Bo, I have to go because my friends are barking at the back fence and we need to have a meeting about Mommy's cranky chickens and that nasty cat on the next street. Me and my brother Scout hope you are having lots of fun in the White House. But we doubt it, if you aren't even having a One Year With The Family party.
If you ever want to have a play date, let us know. We'll come over and run around in the Rose Garden and then go inside and pee on something. It'll be great!
Love,
Bandit
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